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Michael

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Real Quick [Sep. 29th, 2010|03:27 am]
Michael

 Just to make a really quick update:

Last Saturday I had my first pro wrestling match. It was pretty fun and went by way too quick. 7 minutes and all of a sudden Super Ninja #2 hits a Dragon Suplex, dropping me on my neck and, then hitting me with a 450 splash from the top. First match, first loss. It's all good. (Cause I made 20 bucks :P)

Um, other than that I made the first three cards for PW alongside Trevor on Monday night. We've just gotta find the venue and fix a couple of things so they're more aesthetically pleasing. Other than that, I think this project will be a lot easier than I expected.

 

Anywho.

It's late.

Night!

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WUT [Sep. 7th, 2010|02:33 pm]
Michael

 So I get || close to getting a job at Home Depot and suddenly they're like, nah dawg.

Can someone tell me how so many stupid people / terrible workers get jobs and I can't find one?

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Last I heard was she had twins or maybe it was three [Sep. 4th, 2010|11:50 pm]
Michael

 So I've been in a better mood since writing my last novel length entry. It's still a lingering thought, but getting all that off of my chest has been a huge help. Sarah and Roman also made things much better, it's nice to know that old friends will still take the time to see what's wrong. 

Anywho! I'm packing for my Orlando trip that starts in about...8 hours? Going up there for a wrestling seminar, hopefully I learn some cool stuff. Word is they have an air-conditioned building and that will be a great step from the nasty backyard they have me training in. But hey, it's all good! 

I cut my hair yesterday as well, all that is left is to dye it...BLONDE! :D

Yes! I'm going blonde! Why?

Because Trevor and I are forming a tag-team known only as the TECH Squad.

Why is TECH in capital letters? Because it stands for this!

Two
Equally
Charming
Heterosexuals

I can only imagine how stupid we're going to look.
 

 

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Hm [Sep. 2nd, 2010|04:19 am]
Michael

After writing all of that and reading over.

I feel a bit better. Which is good.

Time to sleep. 

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Running back to this familiar place [Sep. 2nd, 2010|04:18 am]
Michael
[Current Mood |draineddrained]
[Current Music |Radiohead - How to Disappear Completely]

For some reason every time shit gets too tough to deal with I always end up running back to livejournal. It's kind of silly when I think about it. 

But every single time I've come back I've had something to write about, this time I can't even figure out what's bothering me. 

I mean, everything should be fine right now. I'm back in wrestling school, I've dropped weight and fat, while replacing it with muscle. I'm about to go to Orlando with my buddy Trevor Read, my trainer and, a bag full of gear while attending a wrestling show.  Trevor is getting booked up there and I've been told to never attend a wrestling show without your gear. I'm hoping they have an available spot and I can work a match, even if it's a squash. That and I have a super amazing girlfriend who unlike every other girl I've liked/dated has stuck around for a year and a half! 

So what the fuck is wrong? 

The things that I believe are bothering me :

  • I'm not in college
  • I'm unemployed
  • While I'm good at wrestling, my conditioning at school blows. (But I can do a 30 minute match without blowing up)
  • My knee still bothers me
  • I still have more weight to lose/muscle to gain

And while all those simple little things wouldn't bother me, I feel as if the mixture of each and every single thing is slowly tearing at me. Especially the fact that almost all of my friends either got a job or went to college. Hell, most of them actually did both. Yet I've sat here all summer doing absolutely nothing noteworthy.  

But here's where it all gets silly and stupid.  Looking back at everything I wrote on livejournal, it makes me realize that while I've matured since I was a junior, nothing has really changed. But in the end I'm still just hanging out not doing much while passing with the minimum required of me.  I mean, I've said twice in two years that this is the time I take my future seriously, that I'm going to work toward doing what I love yet here I am in the same exact place. It's a little easier considering the fact that I'm out of high school, but shit. I miss high school, I miss the kids that I hated, the friends I got so used to seeing and, having something required of me.

And here's the worst thing of them all. All of my life I've wanted to make so and so (usually a chick) happy and whatnot. I can't remember a time where I didn't have a female best friend and wasn't whipped in some shape or form. Now this fine and dandy, considering I've been with Christina for a year and a half, that she's my best friend and, that our relationship has never stopped being perfect. 

But even though it's been two years, looking back at my past journals, there is one thing that I can't change no matter how hard I try. 
I'm still stuck on Amanda. Not relationship wise anymore, it's far from that. But for some reason even though she hates the fuck out of me and Nathalie probably programmed her mind to forget that I existed, I can't forget about her. And while I have this amazing relationship with Christina, the fact that I haven't dropped Amanda from existence has caused more fights than anything else. 
And that's bothering the hell out of me as well. I feel like I have nobody to talk to about this, I try to talk to Christina and, it blows up in my face. We were both so close to her yet she's cool with pretending like she's dead, even though they have class together every day. Yet I don't see her at all anymore and for some reason I still miss her. I miss the friendship, the jokes, the mannerisms, having someone to talk to, someone who I wouldn't fight with over silly shit and, someone who'd have no problem shit talking me to oblivion. Because quite frankly, I've yet to find someone who's kicked my ass in comebacks as badly as she did. 

I don't even know who goes on here anymore, but having a girlfriend who is also your best friend is the greatest thing in the world. But with that comes a limitation on what you can talk about. I also have nobody to plan cute stuff to do and quite frankly, I need to plan my cute stuff. I've tried finding another friend, but the thought of putting the effort I put into being close to Amanda is just frightening and feels worthless. I'm close to other people, but the fact that it's other people is what bothers me. I can't tell my closer friends the shit I told Amanda, I can't joke with them and, talk to them like I did with her.  

And as I've begun to grow up I start picking up on the things I did wrong in my friendship with her. The things I said and I did that began to tear away at everything her and I built up. Stupid shit, things I didn't need to do. I don't even fucking remember why I tried killing myself yet for some reason I can't forget the consequences. Not only am I stuck remembering the people I cared about crying, my dad picking me up early because he couldn't focus on work, my mom crying every day, my brother hugging me while sobbing, Nick coming to school in tears, Christina being stuck to experience the whole thing first hand (which included more crying) and then Amanda hitting me with the line that broke my fucking heart.

"I can't imagine waking up and knowing you're gone."

Like fuck off man, why on earth pull that kinda shit if you're gonna bail a few days later. I just don't get it. I've never gotten that close to someone that fast in my entire life. And I've always been stuck believing that "everything happens for a reason" stuff, but somethings just don't even seem to want to work with that idea. Why give me a friend, who I pour my heart and soul to and, have it torn away because I lost my grasp on life for a second. But then when I look at it in a different light I see a chain of people who brought me to Christina and paved the way to my relationship with her. 

Because if I never got hooked on Becky, I would've never met Nathalie Roman. If I never met Nathalie Roman, we would've never got close and I would've never hauled ass away from her when I learned she had feelings for me. Which means I would've never talked to Nathalie the summer before 11th grade, would've never become her best friend and, I would've never met Amanda. Meeting Amanda and falling for Amanda got me to meet Christina and the fact that I was so into Amanda is what brought Christina and I together as best friends. (She liked Jeff.) And if Amanda never stopped being my friend Christina and I would've never started dating.
So in that sense I'm thankful.

BUT. I don't fucking want to look at it that way. I really don't. I don't want to look at Amanda as someone who I just had to meet to be with Christina. Because honestly if I was supposed to be with Christina it would've happened either way. Through drama club or through something else, it would've happened. Life isn't perfect but looking at everything I've done for people and the millions of dollars I've given to every homeless fuck with a good story I think I'm supposed to have enough good karma collected to magically get my stupid fucking friend back. I mean, I don't even do nice stuff to have nice stuff in return, but it'd be nice to just have something to show for all the effort I've put into being a good person. I don't really ask for much either, I just want my goddamn friend back. I'm willing to work through the awkwardness of starting to talk again, put the time and effort to patch things up. 

And knowing that I feel pathetic every single day of my life, because as a high school graduate I am chasing over a friendship I had with a freshman (even though she's a Junior now.) I mean, I got shit when I went through my freshman frenzy. I fell for like 4 freshman in a year and a half and dated two. Sure I got my shit for it from friends, but fuck man, I hated 99 percent of my graduating class. I figured why not find the good kids before high school fucked them up beyond recognition. But that's besides the point. I feel so lowly and disgusted because instead of worrying about going to college I worry about being friends with a junior. I mean, I had my chances last year to try and talk to her and I blew them. At this point there is absolutely no way I can ever become friends with her again because now we're not forced to be in the same place at the same time. How fucking creepo would it be if I showed up somewhere to try and talk to her. I can't do that shit, I can't degrade myself any farther. 

But at the same time I'm just taking it fucking easy and taking it easy is the most popular way to fail. I've said it forever and to be honest it's the truth. But what am I supposed to do? Take a risk in looking like a creepo old man in the name of friendship? Fuck. 

I honestly wish I never met her at this point because right now it feels worse than it did with Becky. Sure I wanted to date Becky, but I was content as a motherfucker with being her friend. Sure, I screwed that up and now I see what I did. But I was just a kid, I didn't know any better and were I to go back and relive the time I knew Amanda, there are a million things I would do different. I'd let her make her mistakes as opposed to trying to be her guardian. I wouldn't get mad when she bailed on me to hang out with another kid. I wouldn't be suicidal because honestly, that's the stupidest thing in the world. Suicide fixes nothing and as I've come to learn it only makes things worse. You lose friends, you hurt friends and, nothing good happens in the process. 

It just pains me to know that the last time I spoke to Amanda in person she was in tears and in my fucking arms. 
I feel terrible for making her cry all of those times. I feel terrible for everything I did to hurt her emotionally when I promised her I'd do everything to keep her safe. I just hate looking back because as much as I hate idiots, I was a fucking hypocrite. I still am a hypocrite I guess. 

I also regret bothering her for the year that I did. Sending her stupid texts, trying to piss her off to get back at her for hurting me. How fucking childish. I am ashamed of what I did. I'm ashamed that I sent Christina to go talk to her instead of being a man and going myself. I was too emotionally wrecked to even get the balls to talk to her. It's fucking weird how she went from being my best friend, one of my most favorite people on this planet, to someone who makes time freeze every time I see her because of how she looks at me like I'm dead. Well, looked, considering I don't go to school anymore.

Nothing is worse than being looked through and that's what she did. She looked right fucking through me, like I wasn't there.
I don't know anymore. I've probably rambled on for somewhere near 2000 words now. And I'm starting to get too tired to transcribe my mind through my keyboard. I just feel like I'm at this point in my life where I should be striving for more, where I should be so eager to get my real life started that nothing else should matter. And I feel like I'm not doing that. Sure I go to the gym daily, sure I study my wrestling, sure I do everything to put myself in the right direction. But when everyone goes to bed and I'm all alone it's like none of that matters. I'm right back to being the same sad and pathetic fuck that I've been for as long as I can remember. 

At least back in the day I knew some people still went on LJ, so while nobody commented, I knew that at least one person read these things. It's a shame that I have to write on a website I forgot existed because I have nobody else to turn to. I'm tired of every having to run to this place every time I've held it in for too long. But I just don't know how much longer I can keep everything pent up. I've gotten a chance to let some out tonight, but tomorrow morning I'm still going to wake up sad and I'm still going to go through my day feeling bad every time I remember I'm upset. 

I actually don't really want most people to read this. Last I remember only Saki, Jp, Antonio and, Sarah frequented this place, so I
don't really care if they see this. They've honestly been around every single time I've been upset. Which reminds me, I miss Antonio and Sarah considering the fact I haven't spoken to them since school let out. But that's another story for another time. 

I feel like I have so much more I want to say but I can't even think of what it is. I just don't want to start rambling and repeating myself, because that's a little silly. But then again, I haven't talked to Amanda since February 13th 2009 so I'm kinda just repeating old stuff right? Funny to know that it was 2009 but I considered it 2 years because it was Junior and Senior year. I mean, I've known Amanda since October 2008, so it's been two years I guess. Meh, I'm just writing stupid shit now. 

And the saddest part of it all. Look how happy I was.

 

 

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Hm. [Jul. 23rd, 2009|04:02 am]
Michael
Possible meniscal tear
Possible cartilage damage
Possible irreparable muscular damage

Isn't my life fucking splendid?
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SFWA [Jun. 27th, 2009|11:33 pm]
Michael

At work, I started thinking of what I'm going to be doing with the next couple of years.

With that I've come to a realization that suddenly backyard wrestling promotions have been starting up in South Florida.
ASPW, statistics wise, is the biggest South Florida Backyard Wrestling promotion and has by far the best in talent.

So as the owner and founder of ASPW, I took it upon myself to do what I set out to do since the start of my backyarding days.

ASPW was originally supposed to be a place where anyone can come, backyard wrestle, and have fun.
Yet all these new promotions are showing up, all with wrestlers that aren't as good as my guys.

So I, Michael Vendette, have begun the construction of the South Florida Wrestling Alliance.

The South Florida Wrestling Alliance is going to be an Alliance between ASPW and whatever backyard wrestling promotions that want to join. I have my eyes set on NGIW, TKO Wrestling, BYW, and HWF. The Alliance will be a working agreement between all the promotions, allowing them to work in multiple places, gaining wrestling experience at an alarming rate. Also, the SFWA is going to host joint shows, where all promotions get together and have a massive show.

What makes SFWA even more important is that it's going to have the SFWA Heavyweight, Junior Heavyweight, and Tag Team Titles. (Which will all be custom made by me, using metal, leather, and a variety of other things)  This is going to give an opportunity to a vast number of hopeful wrestlers because not only can they be their promotions champion, but champion of the SFWA, which honestly, is going to be a very big honor, considering multiple people are going to run it.

I'm still in the process of sorting things out.

More coming soon.
 

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Mitsuharu Misawa [Jun. 14th, 2009|09:46 pm]
Michael

Not like anyone reads my livejournal posts. But last night in the middle of a match, Mitsuharu Misawa took a belly to back suplex.
He landed on his head and lost conciousness. Misawa died last night at 10:10 PM as he layed in a Japanese hospital bed.

None of you know who Misawa is. JP does. Misawa is the man who made Japanese Pro Wrestling what it is today.

He pioneered something that I love so goddamn much.

JP, when we used to talk about wrestling. You loved the Zamunda Driver.
Well, the guy who invented the Tiger Driver '91 is Mitsuharu Misawa.

I don't really know what to say. I'm just in shock. I've based my entire Backyard wrestling style of Misawa.
Hard hitting, Tough, and Relentless.

I never met him. I've only seen matches. But it's bothering me so goddamn much.

I'm on my way to go pro now. I may have a severe knee injury after a student fucked up an arm drag on me and messed my bump up.
I can't walk for shit but I'm going back wednesday to work. My clotheslines and shit are looking nice.

I've done the Emerald Frosion to honor Misawa since I've started backyard wrestling and I'm going to keep doing it as I go pro.
I'm also going to scrap the gym shorts soon. I'm getting a custom pair of shorts, modeled after Misawa's signature tights.

Because quite frankly.
If it wasn't for him, I'd be watching WWE and wishing I could be like John Cena.

RIP Misawa.

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Hm [Jun. 4th, 2009|10:32 pm]
Michael

Everyone is prolly doing an end of the school year post today.

School was easy pretty much. Caicedo didn't show up so I wrote her a letter saying how she influenced me and shit and that I'd love if she gave me a 75 for the test I didn't take. She did. Haha.

Antonio, funniest dude in the world.
Who else would stand infront of a class and keep their arms up for what seemed like forever?

Best plot to get people to say bye to you ever.

 

Oh, end of the school day.
Amanda comes up to me and she's like "Hey Michael, I just want to clarify that I don't hate you" "

Me "Oh...I see."

Her "Yeah.."

Me " Well...Have a good summer!

 

I mean what the shit.
If you don't hate me.
Why the fuck aren't you my friend again?

Who stops being friends with someone cause they attempted suicide?
Shiiiit freshmen are weird.

Wrestling school this weekend.
Fuuuck I need to go pro, it's killing me.

Jp, Saki, and Antonio.
Since I know you guys have LJ's.

I'd love if you all made it to the supershow this summer.
I know Jp is already ready to go.

So Saki and Antonio. Consider it at least?

 

Well.
I'm off to play TEW 2008.
Word.
 

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Hm [May. 31st, 2009|07:56 pm]
Michael
[Current Mood |accomplished]
[Current Music |Pinback - Loro]

Well, today I finally went back to a wrestling school. None of the CCW shit, I'm enrolled in Rusty Brook's School of Hard Knocks and  in one day I did more work then I did in 6 months at CCW.

Ran the ropes, did an old takedown, tied up, did some bumps, learned a European uppercut and a clothesline.
They know I'm a yarder, it's pretty cool. They're down with the fact I yard. Asked how it's been, all this shit.

They're even training Jeff, 14 years old, that shit isn't supposed to happen, but watch, he's gonna fuck the indy circuit up.
Mark was doing a leapfrog spot with some new kid. Went to go to his stomach to trip him and landed dick first. NEVER wear boxers in wresting.

And Beaver was leapfrogging Trevor, ended up fucking his shit up and landing in the ropes. Trevor's too tall. Dude needs to bend down lower.

Made me jog and sprint in the heat and shit. Of course I ended up throwing up everything inside of me. Jeff and Trevor did too
Trevor's a black belt in American Kenpo, that just shows how tough that shit was.

Impressed everyone with my bumps. I did a walk in back bump instead of standing there and bumping. They applauded me.
That's a crazy ass feeling. Getting applauded. I'm sore. Slept for about 2 hours when I got home.

Went to a D1PW Show last night. Every heel fucks with us cause we're such a beastly audience. Bruce Santee won the title again. Invited us to come in the ring and celebrate. D1 has a bouncy ring. Made me miss being inside that goddamn thing.
You feel bigger than the world when your in a ring. You look out and see people watching you and shit. They actually care. It's crazy.
This personal trainer guy who is a Pro and ICW Champion says he's going to be taking me aside and helping me with my cardio and clearing my sinus'.

I'm coming to my senior year a completely different person.
Going to come trained in Pro Wrestling, 50+ pounds less, and in shape.
I'm also taking up Kick Boxing and going to a flip gym bi weekly.
Kickboxing to raise my cardio and help my striking in wrestling.
Flip gym to learn flips.

I can do a moonsault and a 450 splash. It's pretty cool.

Gotta get my life in track now. I've been this size and unhappy with all this shit for too long.
I'm 17, gotta start working toward what I wanna do with my life ya know?

I'm also going to be in a documentary about professional wrestling. If anyone cares I'll let you know when it's being aired. (When I find out.)

That's about all I gotta say about wrestling.

That's really all my life consists of now. Yarding, Pro Wrestling (As of now), and that's it.
I play games from time to time but not that much.

Oh, and I'm finally in a good fucking relationship.
She's starting to love wrestling too. Went to D1 with us last night and actually enjoyed it. Fuck yes.

Yeah.
Ionno, gotta work on a project now. I hope it stops raining so damn much. Had to cancel two ASPW shows.
Might postpone supershow if we need to. I'm sore, ring ropes are so damn stiff.

/out
 

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